why I won’t “like” the I Am Pro-Life page on facebook

So I have a friend named Sarah and I really love Sarah a lot. Sarah is super duper fired up about being pro-life. It’s her thing. I was kind of on the “I don’t know what I am” fence for a while. I talked to Sarah, and I read a couple books, and now I kind of lean more towards being “pro-life”, so that’s where I currently am with it. That being said, I wouldn’t ever go up to someone who had gotten or was thinking about getting an abortion and tell them I think that I know better than them. I would certainly try to convince someone who was thinking of getting an abortion to have the child and then, you know, if they didn’t want to keep it – we could at least have that conversation. I don’t think getting an abortion is ever a good/right decision. I also think there is evidence that abortions have been turned into somewhat of a money-making machine for Planned Parenthood – PP has, in some instances, pushed women to get abortions (because they get more money that way). In some other instances, abortion workers have not called the EMS or hospital when the abortion fails or the woman changes her mind mid-procedure or whatever. I’ve read a couple horror stories like that. And I think there is a great deal to be said against the whole mindset of valuing convenience over human life. That is a thing. Like, women who get abortions cause they don’t want a boy and it’s a girl or whatever, or they get abortions waaaay too close to the due date, like I heard of one woman getting an abortion the day before her due date. So there is something to what pro-lifers are saying and I certainly acknowledge that.

Coming to the point – the other day, Sarah sent me and a few others a private message asking us to like the “I Am Pro-Life” page. I went and looked at a couple of their status updates, and I was just like….No….I don’t want to do this. Why? I am clearly not someone who supports abortion. So why would I care if people on my facebook know that I don’t support abortion? I guess it’s because…the I Am Pro-Life page goes beyond “I don’t support abortion” to…something else. It’s an arrogance. I don’t see enough compassion for pro-choicers or women that have had abortions for me to publicly support them. It’s a certain persona, kind of a….I have to prove that I’m right about this. And I think where unborn babies and their mothers are concerned, a posture of humility and compassion needs to be taken. And I don’t….see that. With the pro-lifers, a lot of the time. It’s almost like they are….pro-birth instead of pro-life. Sometimes. Which is why I care more about adoption, and defending children that are already on this planet. That is not to say that I think abortion is okay in some cases, because I just…don’t. I just don’t think that, no matter how liberal I get. But I also don’t want to align myself publicly with Pro-Lifers. It’s not because I don’t like Pro-Lifers, or I don’t have anything in common with them, or anything like that. I have some really great friends who are Pro-Lifers, and I have come to respect and love their compassion, I love how the subject can bring them to tears, I love how they want to defend those who can’t defend themselves. I love that. I wouldn’t change that about them. Despite the fact that they sometimes express this in ways that may not necessarily be 100%….awesome. That’s okay. I get it. I often express myself in ways that may be considered….volcanic, so it’s not like I can point fingers. 

It’s just not my style. I’m not anybody’s mom, so I can’t boss around other moms. (Though there was times at Glory Garden when I certainly wished I could). I wish there was some way to tell Sarah, hey, I respect what you do, I’m just not getting on board because it’s too, like…bullish. You’re coming on too strong because a) it concerns other people’s vaginas, so that’s weird – and b) it’s like a….wedding. You have to be committed to what happened for the rest of your life. You cannot make that un-happen, ever. You were either someone who had a baby or you were someone who had an abortion. Both those things can define someone if they let it. So I just can’t get on board with it. Does that make me a bad Christian? Unsympathetic? A jerk? An idiot? An accomplice to murder? Well, I don’t know. Maybe, maybe not. Here is an example of the stuff that page posts – it’s not that I disagree with it, it’s just that it’s…too self-righteous, maybe.


Or saying, “It’s murder, plain and simple!” That’s just not something I would ever say, regardless of my personal feelings on the matter. Is it because I’m a chicken and I want to appear tolerant and open-minded and shit like that? Well, no. I don’t think so. At least I hope not. I just think it isn’t my place.

I would certainly do my best to prevent an abortion from happening, if it was happening to someone who was part of my life. But to someone I don’t know and have never met? Well, no. I haven’t earned the right to speak into their life, and vice versa.

It’s like how Jesus offers us his love but doesn’t force it on us, well, I want to do the same with my opinion on abortion. Even though I’m essentially offering it without being asked, right now. But I can do what I want, you’re not the boss of me.


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5 Responses to why I won’t “like” the I Am Pro-Life page on facebook

  1. Brittany says:

    ” It’s almost like they are….pro-birth instead of pro-life.” that’s how it seems with almost every pro lifer I know. They don’t care about what happens to the kid after. They just want it born.

    Now, I’m pro choice because I don’t believe it is my choice or decision for what others do. That is THEIR decision. If they want to keep the kid, cool. If they don’t, that’s OK too. To me, giving the fetus supreme rights takes away the rights of the woman carrying it.

    Getting an abortion is no easy decision at all. I personally don’t want to have one, but I mean, I have zero right whatsoever to tell someone else what they can and cannot do with their body.

    • Yeah, it’s kind of a catch 22, if you give the fetus supreme rights it takes away the rights of the woman, if you give the woman supreme rights it takes away the rights of the fetus – so it can never be as simple as what some people want it to be, it’s always complicated.

      • Brittany says:

        For me, since the fetus is part of the woman, the woman speaks for it…basically just does what she wants. It’s definitely muddy water though.

  2. I am 100% pro-life but I know exactly what you mean. It seems like too many people are focused on the “I’m right you’re wrong” politics of it. To me, being pro-life means caring for the life of the child AND the mother! I would still never support abortion and am pretty open about my beliefs but I think you are exactly right when you say we need more compassion. It’s a fine line but I try my best to express my views in a compassionate way while still resoecting the lives of everyone involved.

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